6 Reasons Why Traditional Catholic Women Should Never Pursue Men

Video Notes for “5 Reasons Why Traditional Catholic Women Should Never Pursue Men”

A common question I get is why don’t men pursue women?

The answer is simple: because they don’t have to.

Why should they when the women pursue them?

Below is the video notes for a video I did on the topic.

Watch the video at the bottom of the page, which goes into more detail.

Here are 5 Reasons Why Traditional Catholic Women Should Never Pursue Men (Video Notes)


1) You Won’t Know Whether He Was Ever Into You

If you ask him out and otherwise pursue him in the relationship, how will you know if he was ever into you? Some men just go along to get along. Some men are lazy. Some men have no qualms in dating Mrs “right now” when they know she will never be “Mrs. Right”.


2) He Himself Won’t Know Whether He Was Ever Into You

When times get rough, if the man is the one who pursued you, he will remind himself that at  pursue mensome point he was crazy about you even if he is not now.  However, if you are the one who pursued him, you won’t even be able to ask, “Why did you marry me then’?

Do you want him thinking,  “I should never have let her CONVINCE me to go out with me?”


3) You Are Giving Up Your Femininity

Part of being feminine is being pursued.  In courtship, woman are to be delicate, not forward.

Understand, it is a beautiful thing to be pursued.

If you pursue, you are acting like a man.


4) When a Woman is Rejected, It Hurts Bad

“Hell hath no fury than that of a woman scorned”.

Women were not meant to be rejected in this way.  If you pursue a man and he says no, how will you feel?  Your whole dignity is impacted.


5 ) When You Pursue Men, You Set a Bad Precedent

If you get married, do you want to be in the man’s role? Do you want to be the one leading the relationship and being in charge?  I bet you don’t. Don’t set a bad precedent.


6) If You Don’t Pursue Men, You do Your Part in Bringing Chivalry Back

Men were meant to do the hard things.  Men have become so frightened that they don’t want to even enter the courtship game.

They’re afraid of rejection. They’re afraid of humiliation.

We need to help our men be strong, not make it easy for them.

So ladies, can we agree that we will stop pursuing men?   Please.

Four Ways to Overcome Porn Addiction in 2020

I’m not going to tiptoe around porn.  

If you are a porn addict, you are probably repeatedly not in a state of grace.

Some people might say that culpability is reduced because if porn has become a habit, you probably can’t help yourself.

That might be true.  Speak to your priest to be sure, but  do you really want to take the chance of going to hell?

It’s time to stop making excuses about porn.

It’s time to gird your loins, whether you’re a man or a woman and get serious about breaking this habit.

Here are three ways you can overcome porn.

1) Overcome Porn by Praying the Rosary

Pray the rosary daily.

“If you say the Rosary faithfully until death, I assure you that in spite of the gravity of your sins, you shall receive a never-fading crown of glory. Even if you are on the brink of damnation, even if you have one foot in Hell, even if you have sold your soul to the devil as sorcerers do who practice black magic, and even if you are a heretic as obstinate as a devil, sooner or later you will be converted and will amend your life and save your soul, if  and mark well what I say — if you say the Holy Rosary devoutly every day until death for the purpose of knowing the truth and obtaining contrition and pardon of your sins.” St Louis de Montfort.

The rosary is the most efficacious way of overcoming porn in my opinion.

Look at these Fifteen Promises of Mary Granted to those who Recite the Rosary

  1. Whoever shall faithfully serve me by the recitation of the Rosary, shall receive signal graces.
  2. I promise my special protection and the greatest graces to all those who shall recite the Rosary.
  3. The Rosary shall be a powerful armor against hell, it will destroy vice, decrease sin, and defeat heresies.
  4. The Rosary will cause virtue and good works to flourish; it will obtain for souls the abundant mercy of God; it will withdraw the hearts of men from the love of the world and its vanities, and will lift them to the desire for eternal things. Oh, that souls would sanctify themselves by this means.
  5. The soul which recommends itself to me by the recitation of the Rosary, shall not perish.
  6. Whoever shall recite the Rosary devoutly, applying himself to the consideration of its sacred mysteries shall never be conquered by misfortune. God will not chastise him in His justice, he shall not perish by an unprovided death; if he be just he shall remain in the grace of God, and become worthy of eternal life.
  7. Whoever shall have a true devotion for the Rosary shall not die without the sacraments of the Church.
  8. Those who are faithful to recite the Rosary shall have during their life and at their death the light of God and the plenitude of His graces; at the moment of death they shall participate in the merits of the saints in paradise.
  9. I shall deliver from Purgatory those who have been devoted to the Rosary.
  10. The faithful children of the Rosary shall merit a high degree of glory in Heaven.
  11. You shall obtain all you ask of me by the recitation of the Rosary.
  12. All those who propagate the Holy Rosary shall be aided by me in their necessities.
  13. I have obtained from my Divine Son that all the advocates of the Rosary shall have for intercessors the entire celestial court during their life and at the hour of death.
  14. All who recite the Rosary are my sons and daughters, and brothers and sisters of my only Son Jesus Christ.
  15. Devotion of my Rosary is a great sign of predestination.

2) Overcome Porn by Going to Daily Mass

Do you love receiving the Eucharist?  Go to daily Mass.

It might be that your desire to be in a state of grace in order to receive, might give you some strength to resist the porn temptation.

St Therese said:

“Receive Communion often, very often…there you have the sole remedy, if you want to be cured. Jesus has not put this attraction in your heart for nothing…”

St Ambrose acknowledged that frequent communion is a remedy for sin.

“If, whenever Christ’s blood is shed, it is shed for the forgiveness of sins, I who sin often, should receive it often: I need a frequent remedy.”

Receiving our Lord daily will give you so many graces. Again, check with your priest regarding how often you should receive for your particular situation.

During the pandemic, of course you won’t be able to go to daily Mass now. Let’s pray for our Churches to resume Mass again, God willing.

3) Overcome Porn by Fasting & Doing Penance

Jesus himself said that some demons do not go out except by praying and fasting.

Fast and offer up small mortifications.

Refuse that second helping.  End your shower with 2 minutes of cold water.  Read scripture & other spiritual books.  Keep a tight rein on your tongue when you feel like telling someone off.

All these mortifications help you to train your will and thus help you to resist the big sins.

4) Overcome Porn Addiction by Using an Internet Filter or Accountability Software

Along with prayer, you might find it useful to voluntarily give up some of your freedom by using an internet filter or accountability software. Ask your spouse to help you set it up.

Overcome Porn by using an Internet Accountability Software

Sometimes all people need are a way of remaining accountable.

This is where internet filters and accountability software come in.

You all have probably seen Covenant Eyes promoted all over the place. I plan on doing an in-depth review of Covenant Eyes soon but for now, you can check them out to see how it works.

They often have 30-days free promotions, but if they don’t currently have one, enter promo code: BSA-30 to get 30-days free.

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3 Reasons Why You Should Pray for Your Future Spouse

Have you ever considered praying for your future spouse?  Yes, I mean have you yet prayed for the man or woman that you have yet to meet.  Sounds a bit crazy doesn’t it?  Well, let me give you three reasons why you should pray for your future spouse.

Three Reasons You Should Pray for your Future Spouse

1) You Get Into the Habit of Sacrificing for Someone Else

Marriage involves sacrifice.  Sometimes you have to deny your own needs in order for the marriage to work.

Women sacrifice their wills by submitting to their husbands.  Men are called to sacrifice and love their wives as Christ loved the Church.

Might as well get used to it now!

2) You Are Already Helping Your Spouse to Get to Heaven

One of the purposes of marriage is to help your spouse get to heaven.  Why not start praying for the salvation of your future spouse’s soul even now?

• Pray that God helps your spouse to stay in a state of grace.

pray for your future spouse

pray for your future spouse – public domain

• Pray for God to bring your spouse closer to Him

I read somewhere about a man who had prayed for his future spouse.  Years after he had married his spouse,  he was looking through his journal and found the entries where he was praying for his spouse.  Out of curiosity, he asked her what she had been doing at the time.

Apparently, the young woman had been rebelling against God. It was a time of spiritual darkness for her, but somehow she was delivered from that lifestyle.

Who is to say the her husband’s prayers did not aid her in her conversion?

3) Invite God into Your Decision Making

Choosing a spouse is a very grave responsibility and one that should not be done without God.

Shouldn’t God be involved in something so amazing as your sacramental marriage?

Also, when you invite God into your decision making, you will have more of an open mind when your actual spouse crosses your path.

I hope these three reasons show you why you should pray for your spouse.

Scripture tells us that we should pray without ceasing. We have a myriad of prayer requests. Why not pray for something as important as finding a spouse?

Mother Teresa: I used to believe prayer changes things, but now I know prayer changes us and we change things.

So let’s go out there and change things!

Check out this talk I did on praying for your spouse.

Prayer to Jesus, Mary & Joseph for Purity

If you struggle with maintaining a chaste mind and heart, you are not alone.  It is a battle.  A battle for your soul.  However, the Church does not leave us with no recourse.  She gives us many prayers that can aid us with chastity. Below is an efficacious prayer to Jesus, Mary & Joseph for purity.


“Jesus, Lover of chastity, Mary, Mother most pure, and Joseph, chaste guardian of the Virgin, to you I come at this hour, begging you to plead with God for me. I earnestly wish to be pure in thought, word and deed in imitation of your own holy purity.

Obtain for me, then, a deep sense of modesty which will be reflected in my external conduct. Protect my eyes, the windows of my soul, from anything that might dim the luster of a heart that must mirror only Christlike purity.

And when the “Bread of Angels becomes the Bread of me” in my heart at Holy Communion, seal it forever against the suggestions of sinful pleasures.

Heart of Jesus, Fount of all purity, have mercy on us.”

Armed with these prayers for sexual purity, we should be well-armed to do battle with the devil, who constantly seeks to ruin souls.